"When I hear somebody sigh that 'Life is hard,' I am always tempted to ask,
'Compared to what?'"
~ Sydney J. Harris ~
Image by: Ruifernandes
Showing posts with label Stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stress. Show all posts
Goofing Off On Google...
I've been super busy this week, and I admit it, I have no post prepared. And my son is not helping! He keeps distracting me from my work by sharing funny things he finds on the Internet. (When he's supposed to be doing his homework!) Anyway, he had me laughing so hard at this.
I'm sure most of you are familiar by now with all the Chuck Norris jokes. Well, Josh just had me "Google" Chuck Norris, and this is what came up! HILARIOUS!!
I'm sure most of you are familiar by now with all the Chuck Norris jokes. Well, Josh just had me "Google" Chuck Norris, and this is what came up! HILARIOUS!!
Spring Break
Okay, okay, I’m just kidding. I swiped this awesome photograph from a website I know nothing about but stumbled across because of its beautiful tropical images. You know when you’re stressed out and people tell you to go to your “Happy Place”? Well, right now this is mine! On previous spring and summer breaks, I’ve taken you gallivanting with us to Rome, Paris, Hawaii and more on this blog. But this year we are enjoying a simple “stay-cation.” I’ll be back in a couple of weeks.
Happy Easter, everyone!
Three Secrets of a Successful Juror
SECRET #1 - How to stay alert during endless hours of tedious testimony.
Darn those T.V. shows! They make it seem as if jury life will be a LOT more interesting than it actually is. That first day, there were times I literally could have nodded off. I couldn’t drink gallons of tea or coffee because when jurors have to use the bathroom, the entire court has to wait for them. Talk about motivation NOT to drink anything! This situation called for drastic measures.
I’ve never been an advocate of energy drinks, but in desperation I bought some 2-oz. bottles of 5-hour Energy. Let me just say…
Amazing!
I was fully alert the entire next day! Even when we were forced to watch a mind-numbing two-hour movie of a suspect being interrogated, featuring thrilling footage of a lone table and chair, when the interrogators left the room and the bored suspect wandered out of view. Sure, maybe I was a little hyper at times. But at least I didn’t fall asleep during crucial testimony or anything.
SECRET #2 - How to balance your life while on jury duty.
Serving on a jury can be gratifying, but it also throws your entire life out of whack! After a couple of stressful days I figured out this helpful secret. Use jury duty as an excuse to get out of as much stuff as possible, and put your family to work!
Examples:
Me: Hey guys, I’m just leaving court. What’s for dinner?
Son & Hubs: Uh…
Me: It’ll take me an hour to get home and I’m exhausted from jury duty. Whatever you decide to feed us will be fine. Gotta run!
Me: Have you guys finished folding the laundry yet?
Son & Hubs: Uh…
Me: Finish soon, please! I need my dress shirt for court tomorrow. I’d help, but I’m exhausted from jury duty.
Me: Did you finish cleaning the house, Josh?
Josh: Uh…
Me: Gee, I had a long day in court. If you still want friends over, you’ll need to clean the bathroom, vacuum, sweep and bake some cookies. Allrighty? Thanks!
SECRET #3 - How to bond with your fellow jurors.
On our first day of jury duty, all 14 of us were crammed around one table in a tiny jury room, where we waited for well over an hour. Some people read books or magazines. Nobody spoke. Mostly, we sat together in this incredibly awkward silence.
The next morning at 8:30 a.m., it was even worse. The coffeemaker wasn’t working and everyone seemed barely awake, sipping from water bottles, staring into space and trying not to look at each other.
Suddenly, I had a brainstorm. Clearing my throat, I said brightly, “Do you guys wanna play a game?”
Thirteen pairs of uncaffeinated eyes swiveled in my direction. Nobody responded.
Undeterred I pressed on. “My son’s drama class played this game where everybody said their name and however many syllables their name was, they shared something about themselves that contained the same number of syllables.”
Silence. Then a slow rumble spread across the room.
“Noooooo, way!”
“I can’t think that much this early in the morning!”
“Me neither!”
Unwilling to give up I said, “Well how about a simple name game then?”
Sounds of grudging acquiescence filled the room.
“I’ll start. I’m Holly!”
“I’m Valerie, she’s Holly.”
“I’m Matt, she’s Valerie, she’s Holly.”
And so we proceeded around the room.
For some reason, when I shared this story with my girlfriends, they laughed so hard there were tears coming out of their eyes. But seriously, it worked! From that moment on our jury was totally bonded. Conversations flowed. We learned about each others’ jobs, family lives, six degrees of separation, travel plans, pets and more!
“I’ll bring in bagels and cream cheese for everybody tomorrow!” Juror Laura called out.
“Great! I’ll bring in my homemade cinnamon rolls the day after that,” said Juror Kristin.
Our case had two juries, because there were two defendants. Whenever the judge and attorneys left the room for private conferences, our jury would whisper together amiably. The other jury sat staring straight ahead, stifling yawns.
My new friend, Juror Valerie commented on how great our jury got along compared with the other jury, and smiling at me said, “I think it was because of the Name Game!”
Boo-yah!
Image by: Mom the Barbarian
The Real Way to Handle Stress
I poked at the baked chicken and broccoli on my dinner plate and sighed. “I’m not really hungry.”
“Why not?” Josh forked in another mouthful, chewing industriously.
“Uh…I think I ate too much earlier,” I mumbled.
He arched a brow. “Moooom? Were you stress eating again?”
I arched a brow right back at him and getting up from the dinner table, walked over to his homework spot to point out the towering pile of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup wrappers.
“Yeah, well…” At least he had the grace to look sheepish.
My son and I were both under a lot of pressure last week. He had high school finals to contend with, and I had a writing project with a tight deadline. Unfortunately, even after years of careful parenting, I’ve managed to pass my terrible stress-eating habit onto my boy. We both chowed down on junk food with abandon.
The thing is, I know it’s not healthy. I think every stress eater knows it’s not healthy. So why do we do it? Why does our body crave stuff that’s not good for us whenever we’re under pressure?
I “Googled” the topic and discovered one reason may be because under stress, our body produces extra cortisol, a.k.a. “the stress hormone.” And cortisol causes cravings for sweet and salty food, a.k.a. “junk food.” In the olden days, cortisol served a purpose, helping people bulk up on food to sustain them through times of scarcity. However, here in the suburban Midwest, where food is rarely scarce, we simply bulk up. Period.
Another reason we may stress eat is simply nervous energy. Some people bite their nails or grind their teeth. And some people eschew the unopened bag of baked tortilla chips and instead munch on Cheetos, or endless strands of Twizzlers, or uh…stuff like that, maybe.
Then I Googled, “healthy ways to deal with stress,” and found a bunch of common sense advice from experts. After contemplating it all, I thought, Really? And came up with my own, more practical advice (at least I think it’s more practical):
EXPERT TIP #1: EXERCISE.
My advice: FUGGEDABOUT IT.
I actually enjoy exercising, but now isn’t the time! (Okay, maybe squeeze in a few daily stretches to stay loose.)
EXPERT TIP #2: AVOID CAFFEINE AND SUGAR; EAT HEALTHY, BALANCED MEALS.
My advice: NOT. HAPPENING!
My daughter’s away at college and my boy is 17 years old. They both know a healthy diet includes fresh fruits and vegetables, lean meats, and high-grain breads. I’ve done my job. So if I choose to eat three Snickers Bars for dinner one night, what’s the big deal? The key is, don’t force yourself to eat the healthy food on top of it. And voilá! Weight gain successfully avoided! But DO load up on vitamins! This helps counteract the effect of all the unhealthy eating. And as far as caffeine, I say drink up! This counteracts the sugar crash you’re sure to experience from ingesting all the junk food and keeps you going well into the wee hours.
EXPERT TIP #3: RELAX: GET PLENTY OF SLEEP, TAKE LONG BATHS WITH SCENTED CANDLES, GET A MASSAGE, CALL A FRIEND, OR CURL UP WITH A GOOD BOOK.
My advice: SERIOUSLY. NOT HAPPENING!
C’mon! One of the big reasons we’re stressed is because we don’t have enough time to do what needs to be done. So how are we supposed to fit in all this great stress-relieving stuff?! You can do all those things when the crisis is over. Think of them as rewards for a stressful situation well handled.
Disclaimer: I am NOT a medical expert, I’m only playing one on this blog. This advice is purely for entertainment purposes and any similarity to real advice is a bizarre coincidence.
So how do you handle stress? Any healthy tips?
Girl Sleepovers vs. Boy Sleepovers
Now, I’ve become aware that when boys hang out together, it’s a very different experience than when girls hang out together. Where girls like to giggle and talk, boys like to shoot each other.
I became aware of this during one evening event when my son and some of his friends, armed with Airsoft guns, came clambering upstairs from their basement sanctuary to head outside because one of the boys had volunteered to be the target.
“What?! Wait a minute, you can’t shoot those guns at people!” I cried.
“Don’t worry, mom. Ronnie wants to get shot at.” My son patiently explained.
I turned to Ronnie. “Ronald, you’re a smart kid. Don’t you think letting people shoot at you is not the wisest choice?”
Ronnie grinned. “Well, Mrs. Bowne. There’s a part of me that thinks it’s not wise. But then, there’s this bigger 16-year-old boy part of me that thinks it sounds really fun.”
Oi!
Over the Christmas break, aside from hanging out with his friends nearly every day, my social boy participated in multiple sleepovers. Growing up, I don’t recall my brothers ever having sleepovers—back then it was more of a “girl” thing—but no more.
And now, after hosting more than a few of them, I figured I’d share some of the interesting differences I’ve noticed between Girl Sleepovers and Boy Sleepovers.
Girl Sleepovers – Mom goes into the basement to replenish snacks and drinks to discover girls snuggled under blankets, talking, giggling and/or watching movies.
Boy Sleepovers – Mom goes into the basement to replenish snacks and drinks to discover a few boys using the padded exercise mat as a protective fortress against the other boys who are intently shooting (airsoft guns again!) at them from across the room…INSIDE THE HOUSE!
Girl Sleepovers – “Mom, can we borrow your makeup kit and nail polish to play with?
Boy Sleepovers – “Dad, can we borrow your throwing knives to play with?”
Girl Sleepovers – Girls drive to Blockbuster to rent popular chick flicks such as P.S. I Love You, The Proposal, or The Princess Bride. Then stay up all night watching them.
Boy Sleepovers – Boys Drive to Best Buy to catch the midnight sale of Modern Warfare 3. Then stay up all night doing battle against evil forces.
Girl Sleepovers – “Mom, we’re going to take the family bikes and go for a bike ride to the ice cream stand.”
Boy Sleepovers – “Mom, we’re going to take apart one of the family bikes to see how it works.”
Girl Sleepovers – “Mom, can we bake brownies?
Boy Sleepovers – “Mom, we ate the entire pan of brownies and the three dozen cookies you made. Is there anything else to eat?”
Teen sleepovers…you gotta love ‘em!
Image by: Oakley Originals
Cooking Burnout
For some odd reason, I’m always drawn to cookbooks and recipe magazines. It doesn’t matter if I’m in a gift shop on vacation, or waiting in line at the grocery store. They pull me in like a kid to a candy counter. And I devour them. Tasting the ingredients on my tongue as I read and dream about those dishes. Hot, fragrant and fresh from the oven.
As long as I’m not the one cooking them, that is.
Does anybody remember Lisa’s “hot cakes” from the old television show, Green Acres? Okay, I’m not that bad, but my culinary skills definitely leave something to be desired. And unfortunately, I don’t have Zsa Zsa Gabor’s “hotness” factor to make up for my lack of technique in the kitchen.
To be honest, I didn’t realize I even had a cooking problem until recently. Maybe because this deficiency hasn’t always been the case. Over the years, my culinary talents have followed a sort of bell-shaped curve.
As a teen, I started out pretty lame. Never did much cooking while living at home with my parents, aside from acting as “sous-chef” on occasion. During my college days I survived on and bologna ‘n cheese sandwiches supplemented by Doritos, M&M’s, (and sneaking tidbits from my roommates’ home-cooked meals when they weren’t looking). And believe it or not, my hubby cooked dinner the first six years we were married!
Then along came our first child. I became a stay-at-home mom and somehow making family meals ended up on my plate. I was cautious. Started out slow, following simple recipes to the letter. Gradually, my skills improved and I could diverge from the written word a bit. I even figured out how to use the Crockpot we’d received as a wedding gift.
But I think my skills must have peaked about the time my youngest was in middle school because I’ve been on a steady downhill progression ever since.
The thing is, I’m not sure why. It’s not that I don’t like cooking. Cooking is creative and I’m a creative person. Maybe the problem is I try to get too creative. Bored with simply following the recipe, I attempt to add my own personal flair…and fail. Epic fail.
I know part of the issue is being born without that female gene that allows women to multitask. Whenever I am cooking, if I attempt even the tiniest conversation, or to answer the phone or— Heaven forbid—sit down at the computer for “just a sec,” well, forget it. Whatever lovely cuisine I had planned is history.
It’s gotten so bad my son actually photographs my failed dinner “experiments” and sends them to his sister at college with notes attached stating: “SHE EXPECTS ME TO EAT THIS!!!” My daughter in turn finds great humor in posting these photographs on the web within her own blog.
Yeah. Real funny.
I struggled with what to do about this issue, even considered pulling a trick I learned from an old college friend who once confessed he “made dinner” for his new girlfriend by ordering delicious Chinese food from a local restaurant, then raced home to dump it all into his own pots and pans before she arrived.
But that could get expensive.
Then I considered taking cooking lessons. But my youngest is now a junior in high school. In two years we’re empty nesters. What do I need great cooking skills for then? I don’t even have to pretend I’m eating my vegetables anymore if I don’t want to.
I finally concluded the real problem is: I’m burned out. Heck, after 20 years of cooking for my family, I’m ready to retire. So instead of cooking lessons, I think it’s time to pass the scorch—er, torch. Yessiree, maybe I’ll just kick back and let my beloved children do the cooking. How about that? My son can handle the school year, and my daughter can take care of the summers. Sure, they may not be happy about it at first. But I’m actually helping them develop a necessary life skill. It’s only good parenting, right? And for me, it’s a win-win. Nice dinners on the table every night (at least none worse than I’m serving now), and I don’t have to listen to any more jokes or view any more online pictures of my cooking fiascos.
And just for the record, I am a decent baker. I make great snickerdoodles and a mean batch of M & M/chocolate chip cookies. So I’ll still be able to pull off the successful cookie-baking grandma role someday. But for now…
Seriously. I think it’s a good plan.
It’s got potential.
How I Spent My Summer: Adventures in Paris VII
It was our last full day in Paris. So after dining on light, flaky sacristain (LOVE those!!) and other pastries for breakfast…
Image by: Jack06
We travelled to the Palace of Versailles!
The line to get in was over two hours long. (Naturally!)
And I could see Chris already shaking his head, preparing to leave. But I was desperate! Approaching the entrance security guard, I summoned the skills earned from my single year of college French. I indicated the line and said, “Pardon monsieur, mais est-il une autre option?
“Oui!” he replied. Then in really great English, he explained we could save time by purchasing our tickets from a restaurant directly across the street. Dashing between cars, we bought the tickets, dashed back and made it inside the palace within 45 minutes!
The intriguing story behind this opulent structure is this: In 1661, King Louis XIV’s finance minister, Nicolas Fouquet invited the king for a weekend of lavish entertainment at his luxurious new château. Twenty-two-year-old Louis felt his authority was being undermined by Fouquet’s show of wealth, so after the festivities, he had Fouquet tossed in prison on trumped-up charges, then hired his talented building team to start work on what later became the Palace of Versailles. Louis wanted his palace to embody the divine majesty and absolute power of the French monarchy; it took 20 years and over 30,000 men to build.
Years later, Louis XVI and Marie-Antoinette’s extravagant taste in decorating—which is apparent throughout this incredible structure—along with Louis’ military campaigns abroad, eventually drained the royal treasury, inspiring revolution and the end of Versailles as the royal seat of power.
Versailles Chapel
Many of the rooms are named after Roman gods and goddesses. Here is a famous Bernini bust of Louis XIV in the Salon de Diane. (Diana Room—Roman goddess of the hunt.)
Since I’d just finished reading Diana Gabaldon’s historical Outlander series, which incorporates this palace into the events of one of the stories, I was thrilled to see the glittering Galerie des Glaces (Hall of Mirrors) for myself.
It’s renowned as one of the most famous rooms in the world, holding 17 mirror-clad arches—each with 21 mirrors—reflecting the 17 arcaded windows overlooking the amazing Versailles gardens.
I could just envision the room at night, lit by hundreds of candles. Dancers swirling past in beautiful gowns of colorful silk…
It did not disappoint!
“Hey Josh,” I said as I squinted through my camera viewfinder, snapping photo after photo. “Did you know that it was in this very room that Otto Bismarck proclaimed the unified German Empire in 1871? Then ironically the Treaty of Versailles declaring Germany’s responsibility for World War I was signed here in 1919.”
“That’s interesting, mom.” Josh said. “I’m going to go check out that beautiful garden view from the window.” He was off in a flash. That’s strange. Josh never cares about beautiful garden views at home.
Aside from the Hall of Mirrors, I was most thrilled to tour the amazing gardens of Versailles. Arguably the most famous gardens in the world…
Designed by Andre Le Nôtre between 1661 and 1700, the lawns are painstakingly manicured featuring parterres of flowers, sculptures and fountains in classic French Baroque style.
That’s the Grand Canal. It’s an original creation of Le Nôtre, and was the setting for King Louis XIV’s nautical spectacles. In the summer, his fleet of reduced model ships sailed its length.
We found the sculpted shrubbery most inspiring.
Good times, good times.
Arriving back in Paris, we wandered the banks of the Seine, browsing the treasure-filled iconic “green boxes” of the outdoor booksellers, or bouquinistes.
The bouquinistes have been a Parisian tradition since the 16th century, and you can often spot them in famous Paris landscapes, particularly from the Impressionist period.
Pariser Büchermarkt (Bouquinistes)
Creator:Fritz Westendorp (1867 Köln – 1926 Düsseldorf)
Image by: AndreasPraefcke
Deciding the evening was still young, we took a sunset river cruise down the Seine.
With vintage French accordion music as our backdrop, we viewed the famous bridges of Paris.
(Okay, this guy isn’t exactly “vintage” but this is a good sample of the type of music we listened to so you can get the full effect:
This shot was taken on dry land, but here we have Paris’ controversial “Love Locks.”
Apparently couples inscribe their names on padlocks and attach them to the wire-mesh bridge railings, then toss the key into the Seine below in a poetic declaration of everlasting love. Aaaah, le romance! (Or vandalism, depending on your point of view.)
It was such a beautiful Sunday evening. Parisians relaxed by the riverside waving, playing music and blowing us kisses as we passed…
It was the perfect end to our final night in Paris.
Tune in next week for my final Parisian post!
All photographs © Holly, Chris & Ashleigh Bowne unless otherwise noted.
How I Spent My Summer: Adventures in Paris V
If you’re feeling particularly inspired, click the links below for my previous Parisian posts:
Figuring we’d pushed Joshua’s museum gallivanting to the max, we visited the L'Hôtel National des Invalides, a complex of museums and monuments relating to France’s military history, as well as the burial site for some of France's war heroes, including Napoleon Bonaparte.
Later, the boys humored Ashleigh and me by accompanying us to the Latin Quarter and the famous book store, Shakespeare and Company!
It was exactly what you might expect--this totally cool, cluttered shop with loads of new, used and rare books crammed into floor-to-ceiling shelves, and overflowing from cardboard boxes scattered outside the shop’s door.
I ended up buying a book about Paris in the Middle Ages (which Ashleigh yawned at!), plus I picked up an 1866 copy of Beethoven’s Letters from 1790 – 1826 for FREE, baby!
The boys were anxious to move on, so from there we went to ancient Sainte Chapelle.
Image by: marsupilami92
This church was commissioned by King Louis IX to house his collection of Passion Relics, including part of Christ’s Crown of Thorns. (Although this relic is now kept in Notre Dame’s Treasury.) But the church is really famous because it contains one of the most extensive collections of 13th-century stained glass anywhere in the world.
Well, we got there, and naturally the line to get in was miles long. We knew La Conciergerie, another site we wanted to see, was around the corner. So we went there first.
Image by: Hugovoyages
No line at all! Plus, we discovered that by purchasing a dual ticket for Sainte Chapelle and La Conciergerie, we would get to skip right to the front of the ridiculously long line for Sainte Chapelle. How cool is that?! La Conciergerie is the famous prison where Queen Marie-Antoinette was locked up during the French Revolution, before being carted off to the guillotine.
Waving “au revoir” to the poor suckers still waiting in line, we sailed into Sainte Chapelle. We explored the lower chapel...
...before climbing a narrow spiral staircase to the upper chapel. As I came up through the floor of the upper chapel, my first impression was just…WOW.
Framed by eloquently painted stonework, fifteen stained glass windows stretch from mid-wall to the incredibly high ceiling. Stories from the Bible are told in rich, glowing color within these shimmering panels of colored glass.
It was awesome! After dinner we visited Le Tour Eiffel at night.
We were herded like sheep into elevators which took us to stop number one for this beautiful sunset view:
We then boarded a second elevator with took us to the ear-popping 1000-ft. top. It occurred to me that while we were crammed together in the elevator, I had a captive audience.
“Hey kids,” I said, pulling out my totally cool fact sheets and turning to the Eiffel Tower page. “Did you know the the Eiffel Tower never sways more than 4-1/2 inches, even in the strongest wind?”
“That’s really interesting mom,” said my captive audience.
“And did you know that originally, this tower was never intended to be a permanent addition to the city? It was created for the World Exhibition of 1889. For years Parisians hated it. They called it the Giant Asparagus!”
The elevator doors opened and my kids rushed out ahead of us.
“Some day they’ll be grateful that I shared all this stuff with them,” I grumbled to my captive husband, who merely nodded, towing me forward to see the view.
The AMAZING view!!
It was windy and cold, but soooo magical. At one point, Chris and I heard happy cheers and whistles which we assumed were in celebration of the Eiffel Tower’s twinkling light show. The lights twinkle for 10 minutes every hour at night.
But we later discovered through Ashleigh and Joshua, who were on the opposite side of the tower, that the cheers were for a young man who had just proposed to his girlfriend. Trés cool!
Once again, no taxi in sight and we got home in the wee hours of the morning. We decided our official theme phrase was: You cannot go to bed before midnight in Paris!
Jusqu'à la prochaine fois, mes amies!
(Until next time, my friends!)
All photographs © Holly & Chris Bowne unless otherwise noted.
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